blogpost

Summer Nights

There is this thing about summer nights, a nostalgia that doesn’t fade, be it months or years or even decades.

I remember the nights I spent at my Nani’s place, lying in the cot on the night under a starry sky, the rings of the mortein coil rising to the sky while the pomeranian who slept below my cot snored lightly.

I remember the nights at my Dadi’s house, when there wasn’t even a cot to lie on, just a hard plastic mat and sometimes it used to get so cold in May that we used to bring out the blankets from the trunk on the terrace.

It was an altogether different feeling, waking up to sunshine on your face and once in a while, to rains, when you had to wake up and rush inside, taking your bedding and covers along.

I remember the nights at my house in Lucknow. It didn’t happen often but when it did, I was surprisingly glad. No electricity meant darkness, which meant freedom, to go to the terrace, in the middle of the night or outside, to exchange some notes with people you couldn’t meet otherwise.

Summer,

A love hate relationship with you has given me memories which are equally bittersweet. There were power cuts all the time, but anything beyond the mundane life was welcome. It seemed like life got even more monotonous during your time. It was the same day lived, over and over again, specially during the vacations which we craved  for but within 10 days, got bored of.

Now, there is watermelon in the evening, followed by finally switching off the A.C., when Maa came rushing in to tell us to get some fresh air. We reluctantly go to the rooftop and listen to some music until it is dark and the mosquitoes attack. And then we go back to our artificially created atmosphere.

I do miss you, it is true. I miss the feel of heat on my skin when I came back from school, craving a chilled glass of sherbet. I miss sitting on the staircase playing cards with my cousins because we couldn’t watch TV. Most of all, I miss the darkness of the night, where everyone gathered around together, because they had no screens to look at, no instruments to distract them, and we could just be there, in the moment, waiting for the light to come back and at the same time wishing that it does not.

I miss you, Summer.

Sibling Love

So when I was a little girl I had this really beautiful swing under the porch of my house where I used to spend all my day. When you are the only child, you tend to become lonely and you resort to games and imaginary friends. I can’t say that I had any imaginary friends but I used to play a lot of games where there was someone who played with me. That person was never given an identity but he/she was the perfect companion. Those were simpler times. My mother gifted me a tiny little sister when I was 7 years of age. I still had a few years to play those imaginary games. My sister was too little to be a part of it. But then I managed to have fun anyway. She grew up to be around 3 years of age when we finally could play together. We used to make blanket forts and used to hide there all day, making up stories and situations. I used to be the head of the whole thing, being the elder one, but never bossy. And then the day came when I stopped playing these games and my sister found other friends. I wish I could have been her playmate for longer.

Sober Notes 9: Twilight

Why do lovers wait for the moon to have a conversation?

I think sunsets are equally beautiful.

75th Blog Post/Diamond/Stream of Consciousness

As regular followers (I know there aren’t any) one would be able to find certain trends in my blog. I have decided to make all the 25-50-75-th posts about the blog and in general about writing. The 50th one was about writing and this one is about writing in a stream of consciousness way. For those who don’t know, Stream of Consciousness is an uninterrupted flow of ideas, it’s like you write whatever comes to your mind, unedited. It’s your feelings, thoughts, emotions in a continuous flow. So that reminds me of when I was a kid and used to write in my journal, I used this technique wherein I wrote a word and then another word that came to my mind on writing the previous word and so on. This was basically a recounting of my daily experiences and life in general and you won’t believe but till this day I remember the whole thought process behind each and every word and also how it led me to the next word. Surprisingly, I didn’t even know about the concept of Stream of Consciousness then, but aren’t all these concepts just ordinary processes until somebody gives them a name.So since this is the 75th post, you know how it is marked by diamonds, as in it is termed The Diamond Anniversary or something, so this is my diamond post(?), uninterrupted, unedited, straight from the heart. What comes to my mind first when I think about diamonds is that night when we went to a waterfall (Bhagsunag in McLeodganj). It was completely dark, like it is in forests and in the mountains. We couldn’t see a thing, there was just faint moonlight and the shining dark water below us. We tried to click pictures with those handy digicams people use and the flash was on. To our surprise when the flash clicked, the million water droplets of the waterfall shone like diamonds falling towards us. Words can’t do justice to that moment, it was too beautiful to be true. We kept on clicking pictures just to see those water droplets/diamonds. I was thinking about Sylvia Plath today, I think I also dreamt of her yesterday night. maybe because I saw a book of hers in a friend’s bookshelf yesterday. I have been having bad dreams for a while now. I assume that bad dreams mean the opposite in real life so I don’t get worried. Doesn’t it happen to you too that when you see someone’s bookshelf, you can’t sit back until you have seen and noted each and every book on it. Maybe if you’re not a book lover, that might not happen with you, but I am sure whatever you’re passionate about must drive you crazy in the same way. I personally can’t resist scanning each and every book. I read everything and anything that I can put my hands upon. I just CANNOT DO NOTHING! That is also how my habit of reading books started. When I was realllly young, we used to visit the doctor a lot, maybe because of my asthma or maybe because of something that was ailing my parents at the moment but I remember some beautifully illustrated childrens’ books lying there and I could never ever resist reading them. I always finished one or two when I went there and that is where it all started. I have definitely come a long way from there. It’s what they say right, whatever happens, happens for the best! ❤

Love,

S.